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St. Mark 10 for caregivers

    When it comes to our Gospel reading this morning and our ongoing observation of how Jesus is training the future apostles, those of us who are familiar with this story and with sermons on this story easily remember lessons about personal ambition, jealousy, and about how we should follow Jesus' example and live a life of service, in contrast to seeking people to serve us instead.  And all that is very valuable, very appropriate for this passage, and I'll touch on some of that.  However, this morning, you'll forgive me if I want to zero in on a particular situation that we all can face at some point in our lives: getting along with people we are trying to help, such as aging relatives in your family, or other people you can run into as a care-giver.  Trying to help people can sometimes be a huge challenge.  I suspect some of you immediately hearken back to your own experience in a situation like this and how difficult it can be.  Let's take a few minutes to look at this passage again in light of this challenge we face in seasons of our lives, because this is no little thing.  It's one of those places where the rubber-meets-the-road, as we say, concerning our walk with our Lord.    

    First of all, I must refer us to the few verses leading up to this story which were left out.  They give us the context for the story.  Here's where you can follow along, beginning in v. 32.

32 And they were on the road, going up to Jerusalem, and Jesus was walking ahead of them. And they were amazed, and those who followed were afraid. And taking the twelve again, he began [again - 3rd time] to tell them what was to happen to him, 33 saying, “See, we are going up to Jerusalem, and the Son of Man will be delivered over to the chief priests and the scribes, and they will condemn him to death and deliver him over to the Gentiles. 34 And they will mock him and spit on him, and flog him and kill him. And after three days he will rise.” (ESV)

So what do we find?  Jesus was walking to Jerusalem, but he walked in a way he had not done before; he was walking like he was in a hurry to get something done.  He did not walk along socializing with the disciples; he was walking like he only thought of what he had to do.  He knew what he was heading there for, too; and speaks again to his disciples of it.  Everyone following him was “amazed”.  His behaviour was so unusual that it scared them.

So, we find that, while Jesus is already sensing the stress, the anxiety, that horror to his feelings that he would eventually express in the garden of Gethsemane, yet the disciples were completely out of touch.  They are thinking of something completely different, and it seems even petty and self-serving, compared to what Jesus is going through.  The clash is dramatic!  

Jesus is suffering with the struggle of serving the people around him, but those very people are completely oblivious to what he's going through.  Instead, they want him to do them a self-serving favour.  

Friends, as we follow our Lord and his providence, serving people at times can be just that very thing, can't it.  And when it is, what are you going to do?  How are you going to respond?

We know how we would like to respond!  I recall a story from long ago about a Puritan woman who was serving a large household.  She had a friend visit her on one occasion, and the visitor was surprised at how calm and gracious this woman was being, serving all these people.  When she got her alone in the kitchen, she asked her, "How is it that you can remain so calm?"  And the Puritan woman replied, "Thou knowest not how I do boil inside."  

If we are trying to help or take care of someone who can't seem to have the slightest concern about what it's costing us to be good to them, I suspect we all can feel the boil begin, but we know it's not right.  If we lash out in resentment or self-pity and complain to them for their needs or requests - for one thing - we could be hurting them, couldn't we, when we're supposed to be helping them.  There could be a degree of innocence in their failure to consider us - as there was even with James and John; they were just children of their culture.  When Jesus would tell them he was going to die, it just wouldn't register with them.  He knew they cared about him and appreciated him; they just could not conceive of what he was facing here in this moment.  It would be wrong to complain to them for being so out of touch with the situation.  

But even if we know very well that the person we are taking care of is just a selfish, mean, ungrateful person who can't think of others because they are so bound up in their sins, yet even then, if we lashed out, they still would not understand would they?  It's not going to change things for the better.  And it would even hurt our Christian testimony.  There are times when you just have to deal with the disappointment we feel with others in our own hearts.  But that's just what Jesus himself did, wasn't it.

How did Jesus respond to James' and John's question?  Patiently; he just took it as a serious question and gave them a good answer.  He maintained his attitude of service, though it meant no sympathy from those he served.  He was, after all, the Great Shepherd, and sheep will be sheep, so he keeps up with their weaknesses.

And then the other disciples get wind of what these two guys were doing and they got mad about it and started complaining, and now Jesus has this social situation he has to stop and take care of.  He has to gather them around him again for another lesson time.  When he does, he speaks to them those words, now so famous:

"But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, 44 and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all." 

Note that he doesn't speak as if wanting to have a position, to share his glory, was a bad thing.  He didn't do that with James and John, either.  It was not a bad thing - though the motive needed to be right, of course.  But if a person was to share in the glory of the kingdom, he had to live a kingdom life, and that meant a life of service - a life of thinking about other peoples' needs, not just your own.

And that's why we serve the people we are trying to help, isn't it.  Oh sure, if it's a family member, we will have some affection for them; our feelings and perhaps our nostalgia or appreciation for their own kindness in the past, will carry us along.  But there are times when all that is not enough.  There are times when we engage our wills, pray for grace to keep our cool, and we do what needs to be done for them, because we are children of the kingdom; we live the kingdom life; this is our calling, our privilege, our duty.  It's our calling as disciples, followers of Jesus - for, what did Jesus go on to say?  Why are we to live to serve others; why is this a kingdom life?  Because it's the life of the King himself.  Jesus says,

45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

It's the way our master lived.  You recall the old song, "I walked today where Jesus walked;" whether we are in the Holy Land or not, we walk where he walked, for it is the only way to arrive at where he will be and to share in his glory.  

You know, I can't help but notice that the lesson of this whole story is summed up in the words of St. Paul in the 2nd chapter of his letter to the Philippians.  I think I'll close with it:

3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.

5 Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, 6 who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, 7 but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. 9 Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

12 Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; 13 for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.  [Jesus said, it is the Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom; but you can only have it if you live the kingdom life of service]

In conclusion, you know what my prayer is about all of this?  

Yes, I pray, Lord, help me not to be out of touch with you and what you are doing; I really want to be sensitive to you, and not just be expecting you to be sensitive to me.  But especially I pray: God, keep me from becoming one of these people who are difficult to take care of when the time comes - someone who is out of touch with what others are going through.  I hope that's your prayer too.  There are limitations here, of course!, and it's true that you can never really understand everything someone else is going through anyway.  But we should at least try, and certainly not be demanding toward other people or exasperating to them because we've given into self-pity or we can only think of ourselves.

To avoid becoming that kind of person, we need to develop good habits now.  We need to hate every particle of self-pity in our hearts.  We need now to keep Jesus' example of the kingdom life before us and Paul's words to the Philippians in our minds, and develop the habit of joyfully acting this way now.  Hopefully, when we are not as mentally aware as we have usually been at times, enough grace in this area will have been engrained in us, that we will keep on thinking, not only of ourselves, but also of those around us, especially those trying to help us, and while they serve us, we'll try to serve them too the best we can with what we have left, even if it's just a smile and a prayer.

It's complicated!  Lord have mercy, and help us to finish well and get us all safely to his glory.  Amen!


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